Rush Limbaugh has finally figured it out. He uncovered the vast Left-Wing/Hollywood/Obama conspiracy that has been secretly baked into the release of the much anticipated Dark Knight Rises film Thursday. One Tuesday Rush told his audience that the villain of the film “BANE” who breaks the Batman’s back is just a liberal leaning Hollywood slam against Mitt Romney and his “BAIN Capital” connections. You’re right Rush, you snuffed out Chris Nolan and Barack Obama’s nefarious plan. And they would’ve gotten away with it too if it weren’t for you and your pesky dog.
Needless to say political pundits and comic nerds like myself, are having a field day with this story. First there are the obvious facts like, the BANE character and storyline came out in 1993, back when Romney was supposedly still working at Bain Capital and Obama and Michelle were newlyweds. If Obama and his Hollywood pals can make film and political predictions 20 years into the future they really are superheroes. More importantly BANE gains his superpowers through injecting himself with a series of chemicals that enhance his abilities. Mitt Romney is a highly advanced robot that has the ability to simulate a regular human. Totally different skill sets. Either way, this got me to thinking, what other Super Hero films have come out over the years that were obvious plugs for one candidate or another?
This movie was so totally in the tank for George Bush. The whole movie focuses on a guy with a wild past who swears he totally doesn’t remember anything the he did but nonetheless deserves a chance to be part of the most powerful team on the planet. We could believe that Wolverine totally forgot his past as a hired killer and we believed that George Bush totally forgot that he spent the 80’s drunk off his ass and doing lines of coke with his other yuppie friends. Oh and by the way both guys receive mentoring from an old balding white man in a wheelchair.
2004 Spiderman 2
Clearly if you went to this film you were suckered into voting for John Kerry. Think about it, the whole film is about a geek with a girl that is totally out of his league desperately trying to live up to his abilities. Like you didn’t see that John Kerry who married into Theresa Heinz’s money struggled the whole campaign with finding a way to use his political experience and military background for good? Crafty liberals! Too bad in the end he was too much of a softy to win the final battle.
2008 Iron Man, the Incredible Hulk, Hancock
Now 2008 gave us a ton of Super-hero movies, two were Pro-Obama the other was Pro-McCain. You’ve got Hancock about a black superhero with an interracial background who needs the help of his plucky side-kick to become the world’s greatest hero? I bet that David Axelrod was up for the Jason Bateman role first. The Incredible Hulk? Obvious! A man seeking ultimate power who has to control his temper to find the hero within? Obama had to prove to the world that he was not the “angry negro” in order to get elected. And the most obvious head-slapper of them all Iron Man. The story of a privileged guy who ends up a POW, gets injured, learns the error of his ways and decides to give back to the world the best way that he can? Tony Stark = John McCain.
Yes, most movies express social and political philosophies but to when you start assuming that a film project that began in 2010 was carefully crafted to negatively affect a presidential challenger in 2012? Holy crazy conspiracy theorists Batman. Rush should stick to calling law students sluts and waging his super villainous one man “war against women”. He certainly would couldn’t cause Romney any more harm doing that.